Loneliness isn’t just uncomfortable and unpleasant, it’s bad for our physical and mental health.
And loneliness has become so common — affecting at least half of all adults in the United States — that the U.S. Surgeon General considers it an urgent public health concern, worthy of a government advisory issued in May 2023.
“Loneliness is far more than just a bad feeling,” Surgeon General Dr. Vivek H. Murthy writes. “It harms both individual and societal health. It is associated with a greater risk of cardiovascular disease, dementia, stroke, depression, anxiety and premature death.”
Loneliness already feels bad, so you don’t need to make yourself feel worse for being lonely. The irony is that you’re not alone in your loneliness — according to a 2019 survey of 10,000 U.S. adults, about 60% of people in the U.S. report feeling lonely on a regular basis.
So, what is loneliness exactly, why is it so harmful, and what can we do about it?
What is loneliness?
Loneliness isn’t about being alone. We can live with others or be surrounded by people and still be lonely. That’s because loneliness is a subjective, internal feeling.
“It’s the distressing experience that results from perceived isolation or unmet need between an individual’s preferred and actual experience,” Dr. Murthy writes in his advisory.
Loneliness is that feeling that there’s no one who really knows us or understands what we’re going through; that if we were to disappear, nobody would really care.
It’s different from social isolation, which is also a growing problem in the U.S. Social isolation is when we objectively have few social relationships or social interactions.  It can result from changes in our circumstances, such as moving to a new city where we don’t know anyone, or leaving a job where all our socializing took place.
According to studies, both loneliness and social isolation can increase the risk of premature death by 26% to 29%.
Why are loneliness and social isolation so bad for us?
Human beings evolved as a communal species. Our ancient ancestors were hunter-gatherers who lived in groups and relied on those communities for safety and survival. We are hard-wired for connection with other people and feel safest when we’re together.
In hunter-gatherer times, separation from others was a serious source of stress, because an isolated human was unlikely to survive very long on their own. Loneliness and isolation still cause stress to the human system today.
“As much as our circumstances are very different today than they were in our hunter-gatherer days, our brains and our nervous systems are still very similar to how they were back then,” Dr. Murthy said at a mental health conference at UCLA in May 2023. “That’s why we see such an impact of loneliness and disconnection on physical illness and mental illness. This is much more than just a bad feeling. Our social connections are something we need for our survival, for our well-being, and we need to treat them as such.”
Social connection is essential to human well-being. The Harvard Study of Adult Development, one of the world’s longest studies of adult life, finds that satisfying relationships are key to happiness, health, and longevity.
Meanwhile, lacking social connection can be as damaging to health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. Loneliness is a risk factor for deaths from all causes, including deaths caused by disease.
Citing dozens of studies, the Surgeon General’s advisory warns that social isolation and loneliness can lead to higher risk of:

•       Heart disease
•       Stroke
•       High blood pressure
•       Diabetes
•       Dementia
•       Depression
•       Anxiety
•       Suicidality and self-harm.

What can we do about loneliness?
There are things you can do to reduce your loneliness and foster deeper social connections.
 Here are some ways you can reduce loneliness right now:

• Pick up the phone: Call or text a friend you’d like to connect with. Even if it feels weird and even if it’s been a while, spending just a few minutes a day reaching out to loved ones can make a difference in our loneliness levels.

• Reduce distractions when spending time with others: It can be tempting to multitask while talking on the phone with a friend or family member, but you’ll feel closer and more enriched by the connection if you focus on the conversation.
• Join a group: Beach Cities Health District offers classes and workshops for residents of all ages, including Moai social groups that get together regularly for walks, potlucks and conversation.
• Start a group: Not a joiner? Be a starter! Create your own gathering around something you enjoy. Get friends together for a monthly hike or book club, a weekly bike ride or beach walk or anything that sounds like fun.
• Reduce social media use and screen time: Make time for in-person connections by setting devices aside — or use those devices to actually call or video chat someone. Hearing a loved one’s voice or seeing their face creates stronger bonds than just texting or messaging. Using social media may contribute to a sense of loneliness, especially among young adults.
• Talk to strangers: Making conversation with the checkout clerk at the grocery store or the person next to you in line can lift both people’s spirits and make us feel more connected.
• Volunteer: Finding ways to support others also helps us feel connected. Volunteering has been found to protect against loneliness and social isolation. Volunteers who visited lonely older adults ended up reducing their own loneliness as well. You can start with some of BCHD’s volunteer opportunities.

Ask for help: Loneliness is common and fixable. Letting a loved one (or health care provider) know you’re feeling lonely creates more opportunity for connection. Need help? Check out local resources or call BCHD’s Assistance, Information and Referral Line at 310-374-3426, option 1.
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The Power of Gratitude as We Head Toward the New Year
As we approach Thanksgiving and the season of setting New Year’s resolutions, it’s the perfect time to think about our health goals—but not just in the physical sense. The foundation of a fulfilled, happy life, and the power to manifest the future we desire, lies in a simple yet powerful practice: gratitude. Just like in fitness, where consistency is key to building strength, gratitude is a muscle that grows stronger with use.
 
Building the Foundation for Happiness and Fitness with Gratitude
Practicing gratitude daily can profoundly impact our mental, emotional, and physical well-being. Studies show that a grateful mindset reduces stress, enhances relationships, and even improves physical health. These benefits don’t just stop at making us feel good—they create a mindset primed for self-care and fitness. By embracing gratitude, we become more aware of our bodies, more present in our wellness journeys, and more intentional in creating habits that nourish us.
 
Flexing Your Gratitude Muscle: The Key to Fitness Consciousness
In fitness, progress takes time and effort, with muscles gradually adapting to resistance. Similarly, gratitude might not come naturally to everyone, but we can develop it with practice. If you find gratitude difficult to cultivate, think of it like going to the gym. Start small—daily moments of gratitude for something as simple as a sunny day, a good workout, or a warm meal. These consistent 'reps' of appreciation gradually strengthen our gratitude muscle, making it a habit that builds resilience and positivity.
 
How Gratitude Enhances Fitness Awareness
Gratitude deepens our awareness of our physical health and well-being. When we appreciate our bodies, we approach fitness with a mindset of care rather than obligation. Instead of punishing ourselves with exercise, we engage in activities that honor and celebrate what our bodies can do. Whether it's a gym session, a walk along the beach, or even a few minutes of stretching, gratitude can turn fitness into a joy-filled experience, enhancing our consciousness about wellness.
 
Developing a Daily Gratitude Practice: Tips for Beginners
Building a gratitude practice doesn’t have to be complicated. Here are a few tips to get started:

1. Start a Gratitude Journal: Each morning or evening, jot down three things you’re grateful for.
2. Reflect on Your Fitness Journey: Take a moment during or after your workouts to appreciate your body’s strength and progress.
3. Mindful Gratitude Breaths: Spend five minutes focusing on your breath, silently giving thanks with each exhale for something in your life.
4. Practice ‘Thank You’ Mindset: Make it a habit to thank others and yourself. Recognize small accomplishments and moments of kindness daily.

 
No Better Time Than Now: Embrace Gratitude and Fitness as a New Year's Resolution
 
As we near Thanksgiving and the beginning of a new year, there’s no better time to start building your gratitude muscle. Whether you’re looking to transform your fitness, manifest new opportunities, or simply live a happier life, gratitude is the foundation that strengthens your goals. Just as with any fitness routine, remember that consistency is key—small acts of appreciation lead to big changes.
 
Batista Gremaud is the CEO and founder of Dr Fitness International LLC. An International Body Designer and corporate wellness expert, empowering individuals to achieve peak performance through her transformative fitness and wellness solutions.
https://www.DrFitnessUSA.com – 310-424-9608